Stepfamilies occur when a divorced parent with children remarries to another partner. This other partner may also have children. With this process, the partners are often excited to start their new found happiness together, but sometimes children struggle with the transition. Blended families can become as bonded as a blood-related family, and there are helpful ways to bring about success and happiness for both the parents and the children.

Making Your Blended Family a Success

HelpGuide provides constructive suggestions for blended families who are new to the transition:

Plan Your Blended Family

Too many changes at once can be overwhelming and make the transition off putting. Take your time and give everyone a chance to get used to each other and the idea of the new family.

Bond With Your New Blended Family

As the parent, think about the child(ren)s’ needs. Children typically want to feel safe, secure, loved, valued, heard, and emotionally connected. If children feel like these needs are being met, they may be more open to a relationship with the new parent and sibling(s). 

Help Children Adjust

Children of different ages and genders will react and adjust differently to a newly blended family. Taking this into account can help parents adjust their approach to establish a trusting relationship.

Maintain Marriage Quality

While the focus in the beginning might be on the children, partners in a newly blended family need to keep quality in their marriage because this ultimately benefits the children, also. If kids see a model relationship, they will feel more secure in their new dynamic. 

Help From The Outside

Navigating a blended family is a new experience for everyone, even the parents. With this, sometimes parents don’t have all the answers and needing guidance from an outside party can be extremely helpful for the family’s success. Counseling can help parents voice their opinions and concerns about parenting, and it gives children an opportunity to express their fears and concerns regarding the new situation. Family therapy and family systems therapy are also available ways to support your new blended family through the transition (GoodTherapy).

Helpful Reading

Books are a great tool to help children relate to experiences through characters. Being in a blended family can feel alienating because every experience is different. By using books that are themed with the complexities of stepfamilies, it can help children feel less alone in what they are going through. 

Visit the Read Brightly website for a list of thirteen books that may help your child work through this challenging transition in their life.

Familial relationships are amongst the first, and therefore, most foundational relationships of one’s life. With this, it is becoming increasingly important to be aware of their effects on children because of associated lasting outcomes. Parents are encouraged to understand family dynamics, not only to improve their relationships but also to enhance their child’s life. 

Defining Family Dynamics

To help families better understand ways to promote healthier family dynamics, the National Center for Biotechnology Information first clearly defined the term as, “the patterns of interactions among relatives, their roles and relationships, and the various factors that shape their interactions”. The NCBI article explains issues in family dynamics that are of concern, such as health, wellness, and recovery outcomes, as well as the clinical significance of the topic, which focuses on health-related outcomes. 

Why Are They Important?

In the existing research, the impact on health outcomes becomes critical in why healthy, adaptive family dynamics are important. Marital satisfaction can support the health and well-being of parents, which translates to more adaptive parent-child relationships that provide a multitude of positives, including cognitive, behavioral, physical, and mental health  (Lincoln, 2015). For more information on how to promote healthy family dynamics to achieve positive health outcomes for all members of the family, view the articles provided by healthychild.org on family dynamics. Some particularly helpful linked articles include:

• Family Relationships: This short video shows Dr. Michael Rich explaining the value and importance that parent and sibling relationships hold in a child’s life. He also gives some helpful suggestions on ways to foster strong bonds within your family.
• Normal Functioning Family: While there is no such thing as a “normal family”, this article explains how to promote healthy family functioning.
• Feeling Overwhelmed With Parenting Demands?: Knowing that being a parent can often be overwhelming and stressful, this article offers some tips and tricks on how to bring it back down when you’re feeling maxed out. 

In the past, children of LGBTQ+ families were from a previous different-sex relationship. Today, greater acceptance from society and technology advancements have allowed LGBTQ+ individuals to come out earlier in life and start their families as partners. Common ways that people of this community and same-sex couples are having children are through assisted reproductive technology, fostering, and adopting (Family Equality).

What Do LGBTQ+ Families Look Like?

With between 2-3.7 million children under 18 living with at least one LGBTQ+ parent (Family Equality), it is a rising question of how these families work. 

Research repeatedly finds that these families are very similar to different-sex parent families. These families can also be married, divorced, single-parent, cohabiting, etc. The SPSSI found five important research findings regarding the equality of LGBTQ+ families:

1. LGBTQ+ people are equally as fit to marry and raise children.
2. There is no foundation for the idea that LGBTQ+ mothers and fathers should not become parents because of their sexual orientation.
3. Being involved in a relationship with (an) LGBTQ+ person(s) is unrelated to their ability to care for a child. 
4. LGBTQ+ and heterosexual women show similar child-rearing practices.
5. LGBTQ+ fathers are not found to be different from heterosexual fathers in their ability to parent or foster healthy development for the child. 

Learn More

Visit Family Equality’s postings to learn more about these families and the discrimination they face. 

The Movement Advancement Project also has various resource maps on helpful statistics.