Parents and caregivers must actively learn about race, equity, and justice and understand how racism impacts our society. When adults understand racism in our society, they can then teach their children. When children have this knowledge, they can aid in building a more equitable society for all of us (NAEYC). This resource list can help parents and caregivers begin their journey in understanding racism, but anti-racist work must be attended to in an ongoing way.

Anti-Racism Resources

• Confront your own implicit biases with the Implicit Bias Test from Harvard University.
• View a list of books, podcasts, and articles on anti-racism for parents and caregivers to find educational materials that work best for you.
• Read the Diversity Toolkit: A Guide to Discussing Identity, Power, and Privilege from the University of Southern California School of Social Work.
• Find a comprehensive list of anti-racism books to read from the New York Times. View even more books from Buzzfeed News.
• Learn about how structural racism impacts our communities from Embrace Race.
• Understand how race impacts children and families in Pittsburgh from The Office of Child Development at the University of Pittsburgh. You can also view PRIDE’s speaker series and listen to the In My Skin podcast.

Participate in a self-guided journey through understanding race from the University of Pittsburgh.

Trying Together Race Equity Resources

Here are some resources that Trying Together has published to enhance the conversation on anti-racism.

• Anti-Racism Tools
• Defining Race and Equity
• Family Guide to Discussing Race and Equity with Young Children
• Children’s Books on Race and Equity
• Encouraging Positive Racial Identity in Young Children

Reading books on race and equity can both educate your child and offer opportunities for discussing how they perceive and feel about race. Books allow opportunities for your child to see themselves and develop their understanding of others. Culturally diverse books that are relevant to children’s lives can increase interest in reading, improve literacy skills, boost self-esteem, and help to develop a sense of racial and ethnic identity (American Psychological Association).

Below is a compilation of book lists suitable for young children. Note that this list is not exhaustive.

Finding Books on Race and Equity for Young Children

• 10 Children’s Books About Racism And Activism To Help Parents Educate Their Kids, HuffPost
• 31 Children’s books to support conversations on race, racism and resistance, Embrace Race
• These Books Can Help You Explain Racism and Protest to Your Kids, The New York Times
• Books About Racism and Social Justice, Common Sense Media
• Books About Race and Ethnicity, RESilience
• Books on race and racism, by age, recommended by Carnegie Library of Pittsburgh, Kidsburgh
• Reading Race in Picture Books with Children, Embrace Race
• 7 Diverse Texts to Bolster Reading Lessons, Edutopia

Tools for Reading Books on Race with Young Children

As you read books with your children, utilize this list of tips from RESilience:

Young Children

• Read out loud and imitate separate characters to draw them into the story.
• Focus on the positive. Stop and make comments to assess their interest before turning a page.
• Ask questions about the characters and the story.

Elementary-Aged Children

• Let your child set the pace while you guide and facilitate the conversation.
• Ask questions about the characters and the story. Listen to your child and respond to their thoughts and questions.
• Be prepared to talk about what your child sees and hears in the story.
• Your child may become more vocal in asking questions about race, especially if they have read a book on the issue.
• Ask your child to talk about their favorite moments in the book.
• Help your child think critically about the book’s themes by linking them to real-world contexts.

RESilience also has a printable resource for families, “Reading and RES: Choosing and Using Books to Discuss Race and Ethnicity.”

In order to understand how racism exists in our society, parents and caregivers should have an understanding of how race, equity, and related terms are defined and why they are important. When adults understand racism in our society, they can then teach their children. When children have this knowledge, they can aid in building a more equitable society for all of us (NAEYC).

Defining Race

The general definition for race is the color of one’s skin or one’s ancestry, which is different from ethnicity, culture, or beliefs (AECF). The American Psychological Association defines race and ethnicity in the following ways:

• “What is race? Race is a social construct that categorizes people based on their physical appearance.”
• “What is ethnicity? Ethnicity is a category of people who identify with each other based on shared ancestry, cultural, social, and national experiences.”

Understanding that race is a social construct is crucial. Early European ideologies created and promoted it to advance social and political desires. How race is viewed in America today is directly impacted by historical influence. Historically, defining race in America meant defining who was “white” and who wasn’t for voting and census purposes (Facing History).

Individuals can experience race in multiple different ways. Although a person may belong to more than one racial group, how others perceive them influences their treatment. Thus, race plays a critical role in understanding today’s society – it affects how others perceive individuals, the opportunities available to them, and what challenges they may face. Understanding that different races experience the world differently through this lens is the first step in understanding racism.

NAEYC defines racism as “a system of oppression that results from a combination of prejudice and power.” NAEYC goes on to specify that because racism is a system in which those in power can oppress those without power, the belief that racially based bias against white individuals is a misconception. “Anyone can hold a bias against people of another race, but only some races are subject to oppressive structures and practices as a result of that bias.”

This video from Flocabulary showcases the experiences of five different individuals as they learned about race as students. Learning about race and teaching children about race has a profound impact on how our society views race and racism.

Defining Equity

Equity is defined as “the state, quality or ideal of being just, impartial and fair” (AECF). It is important to think of equity as a systemic concept – some systems reinforce equity (or lack of equity), which makes it difficult for marginalized groups to obtain the same opportunities or outcomes as of white individuals.

Equity is not the same thing as equality. “Equity involves trying to understand and give people what they need to enjoy full, healthy lives. Equality, in contrast, aims to ensure that everyone gets the same things to enjoy full, healthy lives. Like equity, equality aims to promote fairness and justice, but it can only work if everyone starts from the same place and needs the same things.”

The Importance of Discussing Race and Equity with Your Child

Research shows that children who discuss race experience more positive outcomes. Additionally, teaching children about their history and community can buffer negative messages encountered at school, in the media, etc. Considering that racial biases may be present as young as six months old, it is never too early to begin discussing race with your child. Continue to explore resources on race and equity throughout the Developmentally Appropriate Parenting Series.

LeaWhile most parents and caregivers wish to raise their children to be kind and to treat everyone fairly regardless of race, children may internalize racial biases as young as two years old (Healthy Children). A common trope is for white parents and caregivers to teach their children “not to see race” or to avoid having open and honest conversations about race. However, parents who do not talk about race are likely to have racially biased children.

According to the American Psychological Association, “It is never too early to engage in direct and indirect communication about race and ethnicity.”

Parents and Caregivers Impact on Raising White Children

Children learn their ideas of race from their caregivers. Parents of white children must model positive behavior, which may first require recognizing and undoing one’s preconceived racist thoughts, actions, and behaviors (Huffpost). Additionally, where children may not be receiving appropriate education on our nation’s history and how race has impacted the structures and institutions around us, parents must be willing to learn about the history of racism and teach it to their children in developmentally appropriate ways (PBS).

It’s important for children to feel comfortable talking with their parents about race and racism (Embrace Race). Let your child know they can come to you with any thoughts or questions, but also continue checking in with them to assess how they are feeling and what they are thinking.

Strategies for White Parents and Caregivers Raising White Children

Positively Responding to How Children Are Begining to Identify Racsim

Young children may begin to point out racial differences as they become aware of them. Their statements may imply bias, such as “That man has weird hair,” or be neutral, such as “That man has dark skin.” Parents may wish to hush their child to avoid embarrassment, but normalizing talking about race will help you respond in a calm, matter-of-fact way, highlighting the beauty in differences (Huffpost).

“The underlying message of pretending to be ‘colorblind’ is that Black is bad,” said Valarie A. Chavis, CEO and founder of CulturallyFluent.org. “Kids might look at me and say ‘Look at that Black lady’ and their white mom will shush them and say ‘Oh I’m so sorry!’ But I am a Black lady! I think that discomfort goes back to the false idea that anything not white is bad, so white parents are afraid their child saying someone is Black means they’re saying they see you as bad. Instead of saying ‘Yes, she is a Black lady,’ white parents teach kids to whisper ‘Black.’” (Huffpost)

Parents and caregivers can learn about appropriate ways to respond to questions that their child may ask. They should also go one step further to ask questions and facilitate conversations, themselves. Natural conversation starters can be real-world events or things that the child is consuming through media.

Creating a Space Where Diversity Can Be Seen

Parents of white children should seek out books, toys, and shows that feature diverse characters. Beyond that, parents can have a conversation with their children about what traits they value in different characters to begin a conversation about race. If a parent or caregiver notices bias in their children, they can address it early by asking questions like, “Why don’t you like playing with this doll? Why don’t you like reading this book?” When parents of white children expose them to multiple nonwhite cultures and histories, encourage them to have diverse friendships, and note the value in other cultures, then white children are more likely to grow up without experiencing racial bias.

White parents, while encouraging their children to learn about race and form cross-race friendships, should avoid “tokenizing” children of color (Embrace Race). This is equally as important for adults when forming authentic friendships and relationships in their own lives, as their children will pick up on their modeled behavior. A profound weight has been placed on the Black community to continuously be scrutinized for the color of their skin, and parents of white children should remember to not add to that burden as they navigate educating themselves on race.

Additional Information

Note that conversations about race might look different within multicultural families or families where white parents and caregivers are raising children of color. Here are some resources for multicultural families:

• The Realities of Raising a Kid of a Different Race, TIME
• Mixed Americans: How multicultural families talk about race, Cronkite News
• How White Parents Can Talk About Race With Their Children of Color, Huffpost

Additional Resources

Trying Together offers many helpful resources when discussing racism with children.

• Children’s Books on Race and Equity
• Defining Race and Equity
• Family Guide to Discussing Race and Equity with Young Children

Children across the United States become aware of the ongoing racism through the news or witnessing racism in their communities. Understand that children are aware of racial differences very early in their lives. By age 2-4, children can internalize racial bias (Healthy Children). It is important to discuss race and racism openly and honestly with children.

Many children of color have experienced such racism themselves, or seen it affect their loved ones. From police brutality to attacks on Asian Americans, racism can be frightening and confusing for children (Child Mind Institute).

Strategies for Discussing Police Brutality, Violence, and Protests with Young Children

Here are a few ways to navigate conversations with your children on discussing police brutality, violence, and protest.

Validate Their Feelings

Validate the child’s feelings, fears, or worries, even when what they are saying may make you uncomfortable.

Children might share their emotions with you by acting out their worries with toys or expressing themselves through art. Acknowledge their feelings by asking them broad questions, such as “How did the news make you feel and think? What did it make you think about?” (Child Mind Institute).

Have Open Conversations

Speak directly about race to help children understand how racial disparities impact people of color. The Child Mind Institute explains, “It may seem obvious, but be sure to emphasize that racial violence is wrong. It’s easy for kids (especially little ones) to think that bad things happen to people of color because the people are themselves bad. […] Emphasize to your child that Black people and other people of color are good and that being a person of color doesn’t make you bad. Treating people unfairly is a bad thing, and people of color have been treated unfairly for a long time.”

Speak calmly, but don’t hide your emotions. Talking about violence and police brutality may be difficult and raise negative emotions for you, as well. Let your child know that this topic is difficult to talk about and suggest taking a break. Remind your child that you can continue the conversation later. In addition, parents and caregivers need to take care of their mental well-being amidst violence and racism. This ensures that their child feels safe and cared for in these conversations. (USA Today)

Address Their Fears

When discussing police brutality with your children, it may become evident your children have fears. If your child is fearful of police officers, describe how most police officers want to help people. They help our communities by making sure cars don’t go too fast or helping when something has been stolen. However, some police officers do break the law. Parents and caregivers should let their children know that they are safe. The conversation about police brutality may differ depending on the child’s age race, and experiences. Ensure the child feels safe, especially if they have witnessed police brutality before. Black children may fear police brutality more because they identify themselves and their loved ones as potential targets. It may be harder for parents and caregivers to reassure them that they are safe (WBUR). One Talk at a Time supports Latinx American, Asian American, African American, and Block youth and their families to have conversations about race and ethnicity.

Ensure Them You are a Safe Space

Tell your child that they can talk to you about race and racism anytime. Reassure them that you are there if they have questions or are feeling scared, sad, or worried. Sharing stories of hope and resilience with your children shows them that good people are helping to improve society (Common Sense Media). Reading children’s books on race and violence can facilitate conversations about these difficult topics. Additionally, children may think about race unconsciously. Continue asking them questions about their feelings and thoughts (WBUR).

Supporting Children’s Mental Health Amid Anti-Black Racial Violence

Racism has been linked to increasing risks for conditions like heart disease, cancer, diabetes, or drug abuse. Racism can exacerbate physical health issues facing the Black community but also mental health as well.  Black individuals are less likely to seek mental health treatment. Only one-third of Black Americans who need mental health care receive it (Sunshine Behavioral Health). Racism has been linked to birth disparities and mental health problems in children and adolescents (American Academy of Pediatrics).

Caring for the Caregiver

Parents and caregivers may experience situations where they are attempting to support their child’s mental health but also must take care of themselves to be a resource for their children.

Seek professional support, if needed. Sometimes children’s or caregivers’ experience of racial trauma can lead to serious traumatic stress that requires professional support. The National Child Traumatic Stress Network (NCTSN) recommends seeking help from a mental health clinician if serious problems persist for longer than six weeks (Child Trends).

Ongoing individual and collective psychological or physical injuries due to exposure and re-exposure to race-based adversity, discrimination, and stress, referred to as racial trauma, are harmful to children’s development and well-being. Events that may cause racial trauma include threats of harm and injury, hate speech, humiliating and shaming events, or any other form of individual, historical, or institutional racism. Children also experience racial trauma after hearing about or witnessing another person’s direct experiences, often referred to as secondary traumatic stress or vicarious trauma.

To help protect children from the harmful effects of racial trauma, caregivers must start talking to them about race and racism early—when children are very young and first develop a sense of racial identity (Child Trends).

Additional Resources

Beyond discussing police brutality, violence, and protests, here are a few resources to facilitate healthy conversations on race and equity.

• Family Guide to Discussing Race and Equity with Young Children
• Discussing Racism with White Children
• Children’s Books on Race and Equity
• Encouraging Positive Racial Identity in Young Children