October 4, 2021 Encouraging Positive Racial Identity in Young Children Most literature on racism for young children focuses on teaching white children how not to be racist. Whereas, there are fewer resources on how to teach Black parents and caregivers can instill positive racial identity in their children. Racially socializing young Black children has a profound impact on their friendships, education, and future outcomes (Embrace Race). The American Psychological Association notes that “Research shows that talking to children about race and engaging in related activities when children are young improves academic performance, racial pride, and other outcomes. Therefore, it is never too early to engage in direct and indirect communication about race and ethnicity.” Resources for Developing Positive Racial Identity Read children’s books on racial identity development from Carnegie Library of Pittsburgh. Utilize ideas from PBS for activities that help children learn about and develop racial identity. View resources from RESilience for uplifting youth through healthy communication about race. Read the story of one Pittsburgh mother as she instilled positive racial identity in her child, via Kidsburgh. View a guide for activities from the American Psychological Association to engage children at each age in learning about race and culture. Encourage educators who interact with your child to learn about how they can support your child’s identity within the classroom. About the P.R.I.D.E Program The P.R.I.D.E. program fosters positive racial identity in Black children aged 3 to 8 in Pittsburgh through interactive educator training, parent classes, arts festivals, and community engagement. In addition, the P.R.I.D.E. website features several resources for parents of young children, including a podcast and parent support group. More Resources In addition to the resources provided by local organizations, here are a few Trying Together resources that focus on race and equity. Family Guide to Discussing Race and Equity with Young Children Discussing Racism with White Children Children’s Books on Race and Equity Encouraging Positive Racial Identity in Young Children
Resource List: Information on Raising Anti-Racist Children As caregivers, we have a responsibility to ensure each child, family, and caregiver is safe from racism and discrimination and has equitable opportunities to thrive. In addition to utilizing books and activities, it is important that parents and caregivers have open and honest conversations about race. According to the American Psychological Association, there are a number of reasons why parents should engage children in open and honest discussions about race: Children’s ideas about their own race and others’ races begin forming in early childhood. Children learn about racial and ethnic identity from their environments. For young children, parents and family members are the primary sources for learning about race and ethnicity. Children learn about race and ethnicity through direct messages, such as conversations about race, and through indirect messages, such as the images they see around them. Children are learning about race and ethnicity whether they talk about them or not. Even choosing not to directly discuss race communicates your values and beliefs. Below is a compilation of resource lists on raising anti-racist children. Please note that this list is not exhaustive, and anti-racism work is something that has to be attended to in an ongoing way. Resources How to raise anti-racist kids: 20 resources for parents, Motherly A Parent’s Guide To Addressing Race And Racism With Kids, Huffpost Race and Equity Resource List, Pennsylvania Department of Human Services Talking to Kids About Racism and Justice: a list for parents, caregivers & educators, Oakland Library How to Talk to Your Children About Race, Huffpost Talking to Children Authentically about Race and Racism, PBS Kids How to talk to your child about race (ages 5 to 8), BabyCenter Raising Race Conscious Children Teaching Young Children about Race: A Guide for Parents and Teachers, Teaching for Change 4 Easy, Everyday Ways To Teach Your Kids About Representation, Huffpost Additional Activities Coming Together is Sesame Workshop’s commitment to racial justice. It combines developmentally appropriate videos and activities to teach young children how to be an upstander to racism. View a video from Child Mind Institute on talking to children about racism.
Family Guide to Discussing Race and Equity with Young Children Discussing race and equity with young children can be challenging. However, as caregivers, we have a responsibility to ensure each child is safe from racism and discrimination and has equitable opportunities to thrive. Note that this resource is not exhaustive. Anti-racism work is something that has to be attended to in an ongoing way. Download this information as a PDF in English and Spanish. Discussing Race and Equity and Racial Bias at Each Age Infants As early as six months, a baby’s brain can notice race-based differences. Toddlers By ages two to four, children can internalize racial bias. Multiple studies document the ways that young children take notice of racial differences and note that as early as pre-kindergarten, children may begin excluding their peers of different races from play and other activities (Winkler 2009). At this age, your child may begin to notice and point out differences in the people around you (i.e., at the grocery store, at the park, etc.). If your child asks about someone’s skin tone, you might say, “Isn’t it wonderful that we are all so different!” You can even hold your arm against theirs to show the differences in skin tones in your family. Parents and caregivers can cultivate compassion and tolerance in their children. Parents can also expose their children to different cultures through the foods they eat, the movies they watch, and the languages they speak at home. A child’s classroom can also support a multicultural curriculum. Young Children In pre-k or early elementary school, parents and caregivers can encourage children to discuss their feelings when they feel something is unfair. This can be the basis for a conversation on justice. Additionally, caregivers should avoid downplaying information that children may absorb from their surroundings. If a child feel unsafe from what they are hearing in the news, tell them that you love them and that adults are working to keep them safe. This is the age at which it is important to have open talks with your child about race, diversity, and racism. Discussing these topics will help your child see you as a trusted source of information on the topic, and that your child can come to you with any questions. Point out stereotypes and racial bias in media and books such as villains or “bad guys” in movies. If your child makes comments or asks you questions about race based on school incidents or something they read or watched, further the discussion with questions such as, “How do you feel about that?” and “Why do you think that?” This is also helpful if your child hears something insensitive or if your child experiences racial bias. Before responding to their statement or question, figure out where it came from and what it means from their perspective. Adolescents By age 12, many children become set in their beliefs—giving parents a decade to start the ongoing process of understanding cultural differences and diversity. In later elementary school or middle school, parents and caregivers can ask questions about what their peers are talking about at school or what they are reading online. Address any feelings they may have about family members who may say racist things, using neutral language such as, “We love Grandma, and we think differently from her. She’s come to her conclusions, but we’ve come to different ones.” Strategies to Help Children Understand and Cope with Racial Bias Confront your own bias and model how you want your children to respond to others who may be different from them. Plan for a marathon, not a sprint. It’s okay to say, “I’m not sure” or “Let’s come back to that later, okay?” But then do come back to it. Make race talks with your child routine. Race is a topic you should plan to revisit again and again in many different ways over time. Talk to your children and acknowledge that racial differences and biases exist. It may feel natural to “shush” your child if they bring up or ask about race, but try to answer their questions honestly instead. You can also ask your own questions back to them, such as “What do you think? Why do you think that?” Make a rule that it’s not acceptable to tease or reject someone based on identity. If teasing occurs, try to find out what underlies the behavior. If the conflict is really about another issue, help your child recognize and resolve that issue. If the reason is discomfort with differences, plan activities to try to overcome that. Make a family commitment to being anti-racist to model positive behavior for your children. Download a printable document titled “Our Family’s Commitment to Being Anti-Racist” from PBS Kids (bit.ly/pbs-anti-racism) and complete the worksheet with your family. Oftentimes families will teach their children “not to see color”, but babies as young as six months old already show recognition of different skin tones. Parents and caregivers should acknowledge that differences exist and have open and honest conversations about race. One reason why parents discourage their children from seeing color is that they’re uneasy about talking about racial bias themselves. Don’t worry if you don’t have all the answers. No one does. Also, “Let’s learn about that together!” is always a great response. (HuffPost) When a child experiences prejudice, grown-ups need to both address the feelings and fight the prejudices. Be honest with your child, in age-appropriate ways, about bigotry and oppression. Children are amazing at noticing patterns, including racial patterns (who lives in their neighborhood versus their friends’ neighborhoods, for example). Help them make sense of those patterns, and recognize that bigotry and oppression are sometimes a big part of those explanations. National Resources Black Lives Matter Color of Change Embrace Race PBS Kids – Talking to Young Children About Race and Racism Stop AAPI Hate Yale University – African American History: From Emancipation to the Present Local Resources All In Pittsburgh Positive Racial Identity Development in Early Education (P.R.I.D.E) Urban League of Greater Pittsburgh YWCA Greater Pittsburgh’s Center for Race & Gender Equity Learn More Additional resources and information can be found on the Trying Together website at www.tryingtogether.org/parenting-resources/
Developmentally Appropriate Parenting Series: Part VIII Caregivers must ensure each child, family, and caregiver is safe from racism and discrimination and has equitable opportunities to thrive. Trying Together published resources to help families including topics discussing race and equity, raising anti-racist children, and children’s books for discussing race. Developmentally Appropriate Parenting Resources Family Guide to Discussing Race and Equity The Family Guide to Discussing Race and Equity offers a timeline of how children learn about race. This resource provides strategies to encourage positive discussions about race for parents and caregivers. Resource List: Information on Raising Anti-Racist Children View a list of resources on raising anti-racist children, with additional resources and activities to teach your children what it means to be anti-racist. Encouraging Positive Racial Identity in Young Children View strategies on how Black parents and caregivers can instill positive racial identity in their children. Children’s Books on Race and Equity Reading books on race and equity can both educate your child and offer opportunities for discussing how they perceive and feel about race. View a compilation of book lists suitable for young children. More Information Note that this resource is not exhaustive. Anti-racism work requires ongoing attention. Find additional resources in the Developmentally Appropriate Parenting Series navigation or on the Trying Together website.
Transitioning from Home to Child Care Support the Transition to Child Care Starting child care can be a difficult transition for children and caregivers alike. While child care has numerous benefits, including access to highly skilled educators who are trained to support your child’s development, it takes trust to let someone educate and care for your child without you. During this transition, your child may express discomfort or fear. That is totally natural. Adjusting to a new environment and schedule and building relationships with new caregivers takes time. However, with the right support and preparation, you can ensure that your child’s transition to child care is successful which, in turn, will reduce your own worries and anxiety. What are the benefits of child care? Although the transition to child care can be scary, this new early learning environment actually offers many benefits to both you and your child, including (but not limited to): opportunities for children to build and practice their cognitive, physical, social, and emotional skills right under the guidance of highly skilled early childhood educators, opportunities for children to play and socialize with other children and adults, which can help build self-confidence skills, lifelong friendships, and more, more structure and routine in each day, which helps children sleep better, eat healthier, and support children’s overall well-being, exposure to a variety of play, art, music, art, and other child-led activities, a smoother transition to kindergarten thanks to increased practice making transitions between home, and activities and other classroom skills, the ability for parents and caregivers to return to work which helps to stabilize financial security and ensures that families can continue to advance their careers, access to a reliable set of educators who provide child care on a consistent basis, no questions asked or additional schedules to be considered, the addition of much needed alone time for parents and caregivers to complete tasks, errands, chores, recreational activities, self-care, and more, and opportunities for parents and caregivers to grow their personal support networks by building relationships with other caregivers, educators, and more. To learn more, view these resources from ABC Academy and The Gardner School. How can you support your child’s transition to child care? To prepare your child for their transition to child care, consider: visiting the child care program before their first day to familiarize them with the environment and educators; some programs offer a phased transition approach; talk to your child about child care, including what it will look like, how it will be different from home, where you will go, and when you will come back; ask your child how they are feeling and validate their experience; be kind to yourself as well but try to set a strong, confident example for your child during drop-off; read books or watch tv episodes together where the main character is starting child care or the first day of school; work together to brainstorm strategies your child can use when they are feeling sad, angry, anxious, or unsure in their new environment; some children bring a comfort item with them to help soothe them during the transition; and ask for a copy of the child care schedule in advance and start practicing it at home before the official start of child care. Learn More For information on how to find, choose, and afford high-quality child care, check out our printable family guide. If you live or work in Allegheny County, visit Allegheny Child Care to find a high-quality child care program near you. To learn more strategies, view the following resources: 7 Tips to Ease the Transition Into Child Care, HiMama 6 ways to help ease your child’s transition to daycare, Motherly How to Help a Toddler Adjust to Daycare: 8 Tips for Parents & Teachers, Wonderschool
Family Transitions and Routines: Resources Learn how to navigate family transitions. Whether your child is transitioning from home to child care, from child care to kindergarten, or from one activity to another, realistic expectations and consistent routines can help them prepare for new scenarios which, in turn, makes navigating these transitions easier for you as well. To learn strategies for building strong routines, discussing change with young children, navigating family transitions, and more, view the list of resources below. Children’s Books, TV, and Movies Suggested Children’s Books to Support Transition, Human Development Institute 14 books to help ease children through transitions, The Art of Simple 45 Books to Get Kids Through Life’s Trickiest Transitions, Real Simple 16 Books to Help Kids Get Ready for the New School Year, Read Brightly Book Lists That Help Kids Through Transitions, No Time for Flashcards Starting School: Books to Help Ease the Transition, Childhood 101 The Best Children’s Books About Death, Fatherly 12 Books to Ease Back-to-School Anxiety for All Ages, Scholastic Back-to-School Books, Common Sense Media Back-to-School TV, Common Sense Media Back-to-School Movies, Common Sense Media Kids’ Books About the Immigrant Experience, Common Sense Media Movies to Help Kids Deal with Grief, Common Sense Media Movies to Help Kids Understand Divorce, Common Sense Media Books to Help Kids Deal with Divorce, Common Sense Media Books About a New Sibling, Common Sense Media 10 Relaxing Books to Help Kids Drift Off to Dreamland, Common Sense Media Books About Puberty, Common Sense Media Kids & Teens Booklists, Carnegie Library of Pittsburgh Selected Children’s Books About Kindergarten, Head Start Routines and Rituals Building Structure, CDC Answers from Experts, CDC Quick Tips, CDC Creating Structure and Rules (Videos), CDC Family routines: how and why they work, Raising Children Network Tackling Transitions with a Toddler, Montessori in Real Life How to Get Preschoolers Into a Routine After School, PBS Kids Why family routines and rituals are important, Evergreen Psychotherapy Center Family rituals: what are they?, Raising Children Network Easing a Toddler’s Daily Transitions, Parents The Environment: Schedules and Routines, Virtual Lab School How to Create a Morning Routine for Your Kids, Develop Good Habits Bedtime Routines for Children, Sleep Foundation Empowering Our Babies With Rituals, Janet Lansbury Essential Elements of a Baby Bedtime Routine, Janet Lansbury The Importance of Schedules and Routines, Head Start Creating Routines for Love and Learning, Zero to Three 10 Reasons A Daily Routine is Important for Your Child (and How to Set One), Petit Why Kids Need Routines, Aha! Parenting It’s All Routine, Regarding Baby Parents’ Guide to Routines for Kids, pathways.org Routines, Rituals, Consistency, and Structure for Kids (Video), Julie B Routines: The Unexpected Power of Habits, Practices, and Rituals, TEDx Talks The Importance of Routines for Kids, Zero to Thrive 5 Reasons to Establish a Toddler Routine, Parents Disrupted Routines Dealing with Behavioral Challenges from Disrupted Routines, Encompass Do time changes, vacations and other changes affect your child’s behavior?, Morneau Shepell Transitions in Early Learning Moving from an Infant to a Toddler Child Care Classroom: Embracing Change and Respecting Individual Differences, NAEYC Transition to Child Care for Children from Culturally and Linguistically Diverse Backgrounds, ResearchGate Daily Separations and Reunions, ECLKC Helping Children Understand Routines and Classroom Schedules, CSEFEL Change Doesn’t Have to Be Hard: Classroom Transitions, Head Start Helping Children Make Transitions between Activities, CSEFEL Terrific Transitions | Scholastic | Parents, Scholastic Starting Kindergarten Kindergarten Transition, Trying Together Your Child Is Going to Kindergarten: Making the Move Together, Head Start Transition to Kindergarten: Resource Guide, Head Start Transitions Resources for Families, Head Start Transition to Kindergarten: Why It Matters and How to Promote Success, Head Start Kindergarten Transition Parent Handbook, AIU 3 8 Tips to Prepare for the First Days of School, Scholastic Transitioning to Kindergarten, NAEYC Transition to Kindergarten, ECLKC TRANSITION TO KINDERGARTEN, The PA Key Transitioning to Kindergarten: A Toolkit for Early Childhood Educators, AFT 9 Ways to Get Your Child Ready for Kindergarten, Understood Easing First Day Jitters: Strategies for Successful Home-to-School Transitions, NAEYC Transitions to Kindergarten, NAEYC Helping Kids Transition to Kindergarten, Kaplan Top Ten Tips for the Transition to Kindergarten, William James College Transition to Kindergarten, Ready Freddy 12 ways to help a child make the transition to kindergarten, Harvard Health Publishing Child Development Supporting Transitions: Using Child Development as a Guide, Head Start Infant/Toddler Transitions, Head Start Transitions: From the Children’s Perspective, ECLKC Playful Routines Five Essentials to Meaningful Play, NAEYC 10 Playful Solutions For Morning & Evening Routines, Positive Parenting Connection 9 Ways to Make Household Chores Fun, Scholastic How to make grocery shopping with kids fun, Focus on the Family Tips and Tricks to Make Bath Time Fun, Kids Kandoo 100 Simple Ideas for Parents to be Playful and Silly with Kids, A Fine Parent Mindfulness The Power of “Good Morning”, NAEYC Mindful Morning Meetings, NAEYC Adaptations and Targeted Support Supporting Dual Language Learners With Schedules and Transitions, Head Start Early Intervention Transition: Preschool Programs to School-Aged Programs, PA Dept. of Education The Importance of a Daily Schedule for Kids with ADHD: Sample Routines and More, ADDitude Challenging Behaviors Why Does My Kid Struggle with Transitions?, Charlotte Parent Planning Transitions to Prevent Challenging Behavior, NAEYC Reducing Challenging Behaviors during Transitions: Strategies for Early Childhood Educators to Share with Parents, NAEYC Responding to Behavior, CDC Answers from Experts, CDC Why kids have trouble following a routine or schedule, Understood Child won’t follow a routine or schedule? Try these 5 tips, Understood 5 morning problems solved, Today’s Parent When routines for your kids don’t work, you might be the problem, Being Dads 51 Mindfulness Exercises for Kids in the Classroom, Waterford.org When a Child Can’t Get Her Act Together in the Morning, Janet Lansbury Opportunities to Practice Creating Structure & Rules: Can We Make It Simple?, CDC Communicating with Your Child: What Would You Say?, CDC Giving Directions: What Would You Do?, CDC Using Discipline and Consequences: What Would You Do?, CDC Getting your children into a routine – DIY Routine Board (Video), And then she said Practice Routines: Daniel Tiger Bathtime Helper, PBS Kids Sample Schedules How to Create a Family Schedule (Spanish), Trying Together 5 Realistic Daily Schedules for Kids, From Ages 0 to 11, PureWow Daily Schedule for Kids (Printable), Mommyhood101 How to Build Cooperation, Independence and Listening Using a Printable Schedule for Kids, The Military Wife and Mom DAILY SCHEDULE • AGES 5-8, The Children’s Center Get Ready for Kindergarten! Activity Calendar for Families, ECLKC
How to Make Routines More Playful Add playfulness to your family routines! Life as the parent or caregiver of a young child can be hectic. From feeding and bathing to transportation and education, every day is packed with different responsibilities, tasks, and opportunities. Because of that, routines play a vital role in caring for a child. However, have you considered how playful your routines are? Why is play important? Your family likely participates in several routines throughout the day whether you know it or not. Tasks such as waking up, going to sleep, and even eating breakfast require a list of steps that need to be followed. While completing those steps is important, it is equally important to ask yourself, “Are these interactions developmentally appropriate for my child.” As you know, children thrive when they have opportunities to play. In fact, play is the primary way that children learn important cognitive, physical, social, and emotional skills. Adding play into your daily routines is not only developmentally appropriate, but it also supports your child’s long-term success and well-being. For tips on how to make routines more playful, continue reading below. How does play fit into my routines? When you think of the word “play”, what do you imagine? Do you imagine your child sitting on the floor with toys, running around the yard, or taking turns during a game? While all of those moments certainly are play, you can actually incorporate playful moments into every part of your daily routine, including things like: bath time or hygiene-oriented tasks, dressing and undressing, grocery shopping, cooking, cleaning, and traveling from one place to another. Any time is the perfect time for play, and you can support your child’s growth and development by adding unscripted, child-led moments of play into your family life. How can I make my routines more playful? Consider using the following strategies to make your routines more playful: 1. Challenge your child to get from one place to another in creative ways. Challenge them to move like a certain animal, hop on one leg, roll, walk in slow motion, run as fast as they can, or create their very own movement! 2. Turn dressing into a fashion show by adding music and asking them to walk the runway once they are dressed. Describe their outfit in a fun way as they walk, and even try walking the runway yourself! 3. When you are asking your child to do something, sing it to them instead. Try different tones, pitches, speeds, volume levels, and more to make it interesting or funny. 4. Try out something new during bath time. Use your child’s wet, soapy hair to give them a cool or funny new hairstyle. Give them a mirror so they can see it themselves! Create a playlist of your child’s favorite sing-along songs and host your own bath time musical! You can even bring in prop toys for an extra effect. Try dimming the lights and adding flameless candles for a relaxing change of scenery. You can even add calming music! Have your own spa day! Add bubbles to the bath, give each other facials or massages, do each other’s nails, make cucumber water, and relax! You can also find child-safe bath bombs and fizzies to add to the water. Get washable bathtub finger paint and let your child’s imagination run free! Bring in different waterproof items (or items that you do not mind getting wet) and let your child experiment by dropping them in the water! Do they sink or float? How fast do they move through the water? What would happen if they dropped it from higher up or lower down?. 5. Make grocery shopping more fun and engaging! Play I-Spy and see who can find something first! Talk with your child about what they see, hear, smell, feel, or taste. Tell stories as you go. Start with an opening line of “Once upon a time. . .” or “Long, long ago . . .” and have your child fill in the blanks! Continue the story with “then what happened?” or other prompting questions. Have your child sound out different words they see. Assign your child to coupon duty! Cut out your coupons in advance and ask them to look around for the items as you go. Set a budget and work with your child to find the best deals! If your child is older, you could even have them add up the prices as you go to see if you are under or over budget. 6. Invite your child to cook or bake with you. Ask your child if they would be your sous chef, aka second in command. Dress up as chefs or put on your special aprons! Assign your sous chef developmentally appropriate tasks such as cracking an egg into the bowl, mixing, measuring, counting, pouring, and more! Do not be afraid to make a mess. See how a flour handprint would look on a shirt or hand towel. Let your child decorate or arrange the food on the plate! 7. Turn chores into challenges! Set a timer and challenge your child to finish the task before time is up. Or sing a familiar song for the same effect! Make chores more fun by adding handheld objects like tongs, spatulas, or oven mitts. Challenge them to complete the task using only those items! Hide a stuffed animal in a pile of laundry and see who can find it first. But you have to fold the laundry as you go! Or make a sock puppet who assigns funny tasks or tries to match the wrong socks together. Host a scavenger hunt by making a list of items that need to be collected/picked up. Put on music during the chore. Every time the music stops, everyone has to freeze! Whoever moves first has to do two push-ups or pick up two items! 8. Talk with your child to brainstorm other fun ways your family can be more playful. Learn More For more information, see the following resources: Five Essentials to Meaningful Play, NAEYC 10 Playful Solutions For Morning & Evening Routines, Positive Parenting Connection 9 Ways to Make Household Chores Fun, Scholastic How to make grocery shopping with kids fun, Focus on the Family Tips and Tricks to Make Bath Time Fun, Kids Kandoo 100 Simple Ideas for Parents to be Playful and Silly with Kids, A Fine Parent
Common Early Childhood Transitions and Routines What are early childhood transitions? In early childhood, the term “transition” refers to situations in which children need to move from one environment, activity, or experience to another. These transitions typically include a shift in daily life, expectations, and relationships, which can create challenging feelings of anger, sadness, worry, or confusion in young children. Although life changes can be difficult, and there will be times when children express frustration, there are plenty of opportunities for parents and caregivers to help their young children prepare. Common Transitions Common early childhood transitions include: stopping one activity to begin another, shifting from a state of energized excitement to a state of sleepy calm before bed, moving to a new house, neighborhood, or location, moving from home-based parental care to child care, moving a child from a bassinet to a crib to a toddler bed, starting kindergarten or the first day of school, starting and finishing potty training, losing a loved one through death, divorce, or separation, new additions to the family through birth, adoption, fostering, or marriage, speaking multiple languages depending on the setting, changes in schedule or routine due to holidays or special circumstances, changes in health that may require medication or healthcare services, and staying at an adult’s house who is not the primary caregiver. Common Routines One way to help children cope with life changes is by setting consistent, reliable routines. Although it may not always seem like it, children crave predictability and consistency. In fact, they thrive when they have them. Common early childhood routines include: waking up and getting ready in the morning, getting ready for a nap or bedtime, preparing meals and eating together, doing after-school activities like sports, hobbies, or homework, and doing chores such as setting the dinner table or helping with laundry. What can you do? As a parent or caregiver, there is a lot you can do to support your child through transitions. Your approach will vary depending on the transitions, but consider the following questions: What transitions have I experienced and how did they make me feel? What types of support have I needed in the past? What will this transition mean for me, my child, and my family? How can I communicate these changes? What questions might my child have? Can I create opportunities for them to share their thoughts, feelings, and opinions? How can I make this transition as clear, easy, and fun as possible? How can I incorporate playfulness into this transition? Is my approach developmentally appropriate? Are there special circumstances that I need to be aware of or consider? How can I maintain predictability and consistency even as things change? What current routines does my family use? Are they successful? What could change? Learn More For more information, check out the following resources: Family routines: how and why they work, Raising Children Network Why family routines and rituals are important, Evergreen Psychotherapy Center Empowering Our Babies With Rituals, Janet Lansbury Supporting Transitions: Using Child Development as a Guide, ECLKC Why Does My Kid Struggle with Transitions?, Charlotte Parent Creating Structure & Rules: Can We Make It Simple?, CDC
Addressing Challenging Behaviors How to address challenging behaviors. In their resource “Reducing Challenging Behaviors during Transitions: Strategies for Early Childhood Educators to Share with Parents,” NAEYC provides information and strategies on how to help children work through changes in activities or routines. While this resource was written for educators, it includes helpful strategies that you can put into practice with your children. What is challenging behavior? The Center on Social and Emotional Foundations for Early Learning (CSEFEL) defines “challenging behaviors” as: any repeated pattern of behavior that interferes with learning or engagement in pro-social interactions with other children and adults, behaviors that are not responsive to the use of developmentally appropriate guidance procedures, and prolonged tantrums, physical and verbal aggression, disruptive vocal and motor behavior (e.g. screaming), property destruction, self-injury, noncompliance, and withdrawal. These behaviors can manifest under a number of circumstances, especially when your child is hungry, tired, confused, unsure, or not ready to end an activity. Communication delays, limited social and emotional skills, and intellectual disabilities may also shape a child’s response to a difficult transition. Individualized support that suits your child’s needs should be provided. Why are transitions difficult? Imagine a time where your everyday routine was off. Maybe you accidentally woke up later than usual, your coffee machine broke, or you find your car snowed in. Think about how you felt in those moments. When routines are interrupted or thrown off, it is easy to have an emotional response. You may feel angry, overwhelmed, sad, or uneasy. And those emotions may impact your day or communications with other people. Just as you feel those emotions, children feel the same things when their usual routine is disrupted. Transitioning to a new activity, environment, or experience is difficult. Imagine what it felt like when you first started your job or back to when you first started school. Those times are filled with uncertainty and require you to learn new things, make new relationships, meet new expectations, and adjust to a new schedule. However, as an adult, you have had the time and experience to build social, emotional, and coping skills to get through those transitions. Children, on the other hand, are still in the process of building and practicing those skills. That is why it is crucial to support your child as they navigate these shifts in their lives. Your actions and support act as a guide for your child, and the skills they learn (or do not learn) in early childhood will shape the way they cope with transitions throughout the rest of their life. How can you address challenging behaviors? Look at your family schedule and see if there are any transitions that are not necessary or that could be changed. Having a consistent schedule makes it easier for your child to predict what their day will look like and prepare. Use visual cues such as mini-schedules posted on a table or wall to help give them a clear picture of their day. Review it together in the morning and throughout the day. Add playfulness into your transitions by using music, singing songs, or making predictable notices to signal transitions. Consider what skills your child needs to make a transition. For example, if they need to brush their teeth before bed, can they complete that task independently, or do they need assistance from a trusted adult? If your child has not mastered that skill, find ways to practice it together and offer support. Teach your child a wide range of emotion words to help them accurately express how they are feeling. Validate their feelings and let them feel them freely. Practice mindfulness strategies together (such as belly breathing) regularly. Do not wait until a transition happens or until a difficult emotion is expressed to teach them. Practicing them in a calm state of body and mind is equally important as practicing them in a difficult moment. Learn More To learn more about addressing challenging behaviors, view this resource from NAEYC.
Children’s Books About Transitions Find books about childhood transitions. Are you looking for children’s books that talk about common childhood transitions? You are in the right place! See the list below to find books that talk about going to school, loss, changing family dynamics, and more. Transition to Child Care and Pre-k D. W.’s Guide to Preschool by Marc Brown Bye-Bye Time by Elizabeth Verdick and Marieka Heinlen Don’t Go! by Jane Breskin Zalben Adam’s Daycare by Julie Ovenell-Carter Carl Goes to Daycare by Alexandra Day Preschool, Here I Come! by David J Steinberg My First Day at Preschool by Justine Fontes What to Expect at Preschool by Heidi Eisenberg Murkoff Rosie Goes to Preschool by Karen Katz Maisy Goes to School by Lucy Cousins Preschool Day Hooray! by Linda Leopold Strauss and Hiroe Nakata Wombat Goes to School by Jackie French and Bruce Whatley Pete the Cat: Rocking in My School Shoes by James Dean The Kissing Hand by Audrey Penn, Ruth E. Harper and Nancy M. Leak The Night Before Preschool by Natasha Wing I Love You All Day Long by Francesca Rusackas and Priscilla Burris The Invisible String by Patrice Karst The I Love You Book by Todd Parr Don’t Forget I Love You by Miriam Moss When Mama Goes to Work by Marsha Forchuk Skrypuch When Mama Gets Home by Eileen Spinelli Charlie and Lola: I Am Too Absolutely Small For School by Lauren Child Monkey Not Ready for Kindergarten by Marc Brown Will You Come Back for Me? by Ann Tompert First Day by Joan Rankin Llama Llama Misses Mama by Anna Dewdney I Love You All Day Long by Francesca Rusackas This Is How We Get Ready by DK Friends at School by Rochelle Bunnett When Mama Comes Home Tonight by Eileen Spinelli Transition to Kindergarten How to Be Kind in Kindergarten by D.J. Steinberg Miss Bindergarten Gets Ready for Kindergarten by Joseph Slate The King of Kindergarten by Derrick Barnes When You Go to Kindergarten by James Howe Countdown to Kindergarten by Alison McGhee All Are Welcome by Alexandra Penfold Sam and Gram and the First Day of School by Dianne L. Blomberg A New School Year by Sally Derby Wemberly Worried by Kevin Henkes Mae’s First Day of School by Kate Berube The Night Before Kindergarten by Natasha Wing Froggy Goes to School by Jonathan London Peppa’s School Day by Meredith Rusu Clifford Goes to Kindergarten by Norman Bridwell The Pigeon Has to Go to School by Mo Willems Welcome, Roberto! Bienvenido, Roberto! By Mary Schwartz Noodles: I Love School! by Hans Wilhelm Amanda Panda Quits Kindergarten by Candice Ransom Amelia Bedelia’s First Day of School by Herman Parish Kindergarten, Here I Come! by D.J. Steinberg Adventure Annie Goes to Kindergarten by Toni Buzzeo Sounds Like School Spirit by Meg Fleming I Got the School Spirit by Connie Schofield-Morrison Timothy Goes to School by Rosemary Wells Off to School, Baby Duck! by Amy Hest Look Out Kindergarten, Here I Come! by Nancy Carlson Sorry, Grown-Ups, You Can’t Go to School! by Christina Geist This Is How We Get Ready by DK Take Your Pet to School Day by Linda Ashman Molly Rides the School Bus by Julie Brillhart School Bus by Donald Crews I Am Too Absolutely Small for School by Lauren Child Sparky and Eddie: The First Day of School by Tony Johnston Corduroy Goes to School by Don Freeman and B.G. Hennessy The Day You Begin by Jacqueline Woodson Will I Have a Friend? By Miriam Cohen Milk Goes to School by Terry Border Pete the Cat: Rocking in My School Shoes by Eric Litwin Barnaby Never Forgets by Pierre Collet-Derby How to Get Your Teacher Ready by Jean Reagan Wemberly Worried by Kevin Henkes Bob and Flo by Rebecca Ashdown Oh My Baby Little One by Kathi Appelt The Kissing Hand by Audrey Penn, Ruth E. Harper, and Nancy M. Leak School’s First Day of School by Adam Rex Worries, Anxiety, and Grief First Day Jitters by Julie Danneberg Ruby Finds A Worry by Tom Percival Jonathan James and the Whatif Monster by Michelle Nelson-Schmidt Wemberly Worried by Kevin Henkes Scaredy Squirrel by Melanie Watt I Am So Brave by Stephen Krensky I Can Do It Myself by Stephen Krensky Maybe Tomorrow? by Charlotte Agell I’m Sad by Michael Ian Black When Sadness Is at Your Door by Eva Eland One Wave at a Time by Holly Thompson Divorce Was It the Chocolate Pudding? by Sandra Levins It’s Not Your Fault, Koko Bear by Vicki Lansky Divorce Is the Worst by Anastasia Higginbotham My Family’s Changing by Pat Thomas Two Homes by Claire Masurel Dinosaurs Divorce by Marc Brown The Invisible String by Patrice Karst I Don’t Want to Talk About It by Jesse Franz Ransom A Family is a Family is a Family by Sara O’Leary The Family Book by Todd Parr Families, Families, Families! by Suzanne Lang Remarriage Do You Sing Twinkle? by Sandra Levins Families by Kerry McCluskey and Jesse Unaapik Mike When Otis Courted Mama by Kathi Appelt Step One, Step Two, Step Three and Four by Maria Ashworth I’ll Never Let You Go by Smriti Prasadam-Halls My Blended Family by Claudia Herrington The Ring Bearer by Floyd Cooper A Family is a Family is a Family by Sara O’Leary The Family Book by Todd Parr Families, Families, Families! by Suzanne Lang Loss of a Loved One When Dinosaurs Die by Laurie Krasny Brown Death Is Stupid by Anastasia Higginbotham I Miss You by Pat Thomas Lifetimes by Bryan Mellonie and Robert Ingpen The Goodbye Book by Todd Parr Weekends with Max and His Dad by Linda Urban Road Trip with Max and His Mom by Linda Urban Ida, Always by Caron Levis and Charles Santoso Remembering Blue Fish by Daniel Tiger’s Neighborhood The Yellow Suitcase by Meera Sriram The Dead Bird by Margaret Wise Brown Why Do I Feel So Sad? by Tracy Lambert, LPC Where Do They Go? by Julia Alvarez The Memory Box by Joanna Rowland From North to South by René Colato Laínez Death of Cupcake by Susan Nicholas, MD The Day My Dad Turned Invisible by Sean R. Simmons The Arrival of a New Sibling Olivia: A Guide to Being a Big Sister by Natalie Shaw I’m a Big Sister / I’m a Big Brother by Joanna Cole Henry Is a Big Brother by Alyssa Satin Capucilli Peter’s Chair by Ezra Jack Keats 101 Things to Do With Baby by Jan Ormerod We Have a Baby by Cathryn Falwell Big Sister and Little Sister by Charlotte Zolotow Living in a New Place A New House by Jill Wenzel A House for Hermit Crab by Eric Carle The New Bear at School by Carrie Weston The Berenstain Bears’ Moving Day by Stan and Jan Berenstain My Very Exciting, Sorta Scary, Big Move: A Workbook for Children Moving to a New Home by Lori Attanasio Woodring The Good-Pie Party by Liz Garton Scanlon and Kady MacDonald Denton Moving Day! by Jess Stockham Hannah is My Name by Belle Yang Good-Bye, 382 Shin Dang Dong by Frances Park Lailah’s Lunchbox by Reem Faruqi I’m New Here by Anne Sibley O’Brien A New House by Jill Wenzel and Jan Westberg A Kiss Goodbye by Audrey Penn The Name Jar by Yangsook Choi Danbi Leads the School Parade by Anna Kim Dreamers by Yuyi Morales Bad Bye, Good Bye by Deborah Underwood Bunny Bungalow by Cynthia Rylant Henry and Mudge and Annie’s Good Move by Cynthia Rylant Mama’s Nightingale: A Story of Immigration and Separation by Edwidge Danticat Two White Rabbits by Jairo Buitrago The Seeds of Friendship by Michael Foreman My Name Is Sangoel by Karen Williams My Name Is Yoon by Helen Recorvits Here I Am by Patti Kim My Two Blankets by Irena Kobald Dear Baobab by Cheryl Foggo My Diary from Here to There by Amada Irma Perez Chocolate Milk, Por Favor by Maria Dismondy The Quiet Place by Sarah Stewart A Movie in My Pillow by Jorge Argueta Home at Last by Susan Middleton Elya Moving House by Anne Civardi and Stephen Cartwright I Like Where I Am by Jessica Harper Nana in the City by Lauren Castillo Alexander, Who’s Not (Do You Hear Me? I Mean It!) Going to Move by Judith Viorst and Ray Cruz Bella and Stella Come Home by Anika Denise and Christoper Denise Augustine by Melanie Watt Gender Identity and Sexual Orientation It Feels Good to Be Yourself: A Book About Gender Identity by Theresa Thorn 10,000 Dresses by Marcus Ewert Elena’s Serenade by Campbell Geeslin Introducing Teddy by Jessica Walton Neither by Airlie Anderson I am Jazz by Jessica Herthel and Jazz Jennings Be Who You Are! by Jennifer Carr One of a Kind, Like Me by Laurin Mayeno Learn More To learn more, view these articles on children’s books that support transitions. Best Books: Our Recommendations for Families, Common Sense Media Suggested Children’s Books to Support Transition, Human Development Institute 14 books to help ease children through transitions, The Art of Simple 45 Books to Get Kids Through Life’s Trickiest Transitions, Real Simple 16 Books to Help Kids Get Ready for the New School Year, Read Brightly Booklist – Books for Class Transitions, Books for Topics Book Lists That Help Kids Through Transitions, No Time for Flashcards Starting School: Books to Help Ease the Transition, Childhood 101 The Best Children’s Books About Death, Fatherly 12 Books to Ease Back-to-School Anxiety for All Ages, Scholastic
